There
are seven signs to help you avoid falling into the victim role. Becoming aware of these signs—which
are basically identifying situations in your life that are potential triggers—is the first step in avoiding the victim role.
The first of the seven signs was discussed in my March post, What Does It Mean To Be The Victim?, the same article as referenced above.
The
second sign:
· You
might be vulnerable to falling into the role of victim if: You used to be
creative, or always wanted to be, but you now have no creative outlet. Maybe no
one encouraged your natural talents as you were growing up. Maybe you used to
paint or dance or write but stopped for some reason. You’ve lost the desire to
express yourself creatively and you blame someone else. Maybe your spouse,
children, or job are taking up all your time, leaving no room for you to write,
paint, or learn to play a musical instrument. Not having a creative form of
expressing yourself has limited passion in your relationship with others,
namely with your partner. Perhaps you’ve even developed unhealthy relationships
to fill the void. When we lose touch with our own inner knowing, our soul, our
wisdom, we are easy prey.
The
sacral chakra, which is associated with inner wisdom and creativity, is
impacted if any of the above signs are present. The March issue of my New Spirit Journal column,Chakra Talk: Wisdom: Why It's the Key Aspect of the Sacral Chakra, provides
more on what it feels like to lose touch with your inner wisdom and several
tips on how to reconnect to it. Staying connected
to your inner wisdom is empowering and guards from falling victim.
In
addition to the tips outlined in my New Spirit Journal column, below is a self-help tool I developed
to aid in getting out of the victim role. It's basically a 3-step action plan and helps
identify the problem (or trigger), what you plan to do about it, along with an
affirmation to help you stick to your plan; in other words, form a new
habit or way of thinking. I call this
tool the AAA Plan and invite you to write your own based on what you may have
discovered by reading this post and New Spirit Journal article.
· Awareness:
Journal up to a page about any of the signs you feel may be present for you
with regard to how you are losing touch with your inner wisdom, your creativity. Or any relationships that are draining you
or preventing you from expressing yourself creatively. Review what you've written then summarize
into one sentence.
· Action:
What one action can you take to help you reconnect with your inner wisdom? Your action will serve you best if it is
creative and has meaning. Do you want to
paint, sing, dance, write?
· Affirmation:
Affirmations work best when you get
still, as in meditation or walking in nature.
Write an affirmation to support your plan. Memorize your affirmation. Use all of it or part of it as a mantra. You can write several but choose one for your
final AAA Plan. One tip on writing affirmations is to include action and
feeling words. Example: "I am eagerly and
happily enjoying the freedom I feel while painting (singing, writing, etc)." The affirmation must be written in the
present tense and as if it already exists.
Make it feel as if it has
already happened.
Now,
write one statement for each element of the (AAA) 3-step action plan: Awareness, Action, Affirmation. Keep it short and use a small note card or sticky note. Carry the card with you or post it in a location
where you will see it often.
The
secret in avoiding the victim role is seeing the signs and addressing them
right away. When we choose to ignore the signs, they get buried in our
subconscious mind and gradually become routine behavior, or worse, beleifs. Beliefs that keep you trapped in the victim role based on external circumstances. And as we all
know, habits and (false) beleifs are hard to break! Becoming self-aware helps to correct a problem
before it takes root. We’re all vulnerable, so it’s good to start paying
attention to the signs. When you do, you
are less likely to be impacted by what others do, don't do, say or don't say—and
not fall into the role of victim in the first place!
For one last tip see the April post on my Trinity of Truth blog.
